Bernie Sanders Discovers Cause of Great Depression

I think Bernie Sanders is to be congratulated for finally bringing to light the true cause of widespread lack of food during the great depression. You may have thought that this was caused by government programs which deliberately destroyed large portions of farmers’ crops. If so, you don’t know how wrong you are. It was the overabundance of deodorant brands which ultimately caused the Great Depression, and which continues to plague our nation to this very day. And it is only now, as the number of sneaker brands begins to dwindle into the double digits (really?), that we are finally starting to pull out of this recession. So let this be a reminder. Every time you see shelves lined with deodorants, recall that each brand is responsible for the starvation of millions of people around the world.

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